August 21, 2024 12:23 PM UTC

State House Candidate Claims To Know "Women's Studies" Creepily Well

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• by: Colorado Pols

Readers may recall back in 2020 when a Republican candidate for House District 34, Mark Bromley, was effectively disowned by the district Republican party after getting in a public spat with a homeschool parent. Bromley went on to lose this competitive House race to the incumbent Rep. Kyle Mullica, who was in turn succeeded by Rep. Jenny Willford after Mullica moved up to the Senate. Bromley then lost the election for Mayor of Northglenn in 2023, a race in which Bromley reportedly took to calling himself the (pardon us) “George Floyd of Northglenn” for reasons known only to him.

Now running as an unaffiliated candidate for the same House seat against Rep. Willford, Bromley has further refined his message now that he’s up against a female incumbent. No longer the “George Floyd of Northglenn,” Bromley is now running on the platform that his “understanding of Women’s studies is superior to the incumbent.”

No really, we couldn’t make this wacky stuff up if we tried:

I can say from experience my understanding of Women’s studies is superior to the incumbent. Since conception I have studied women. [Pols emphasis] Raised by Women and educated by Women. Honestly being that I spent most of my time in college living in the Woman’s Dorm. Not only did I recruit pledges for my Fraternity, I also recruited Women for our Sorority. Then going to Japan and being married to the finest Woman I know my wife. I Totally graduated Women Studies. This I am certain. [Pols emphasis]

So first of all, Rep. Jenny Willford’s degree from the University of Wyoming is literally in women’s studies. That we assume is what prompted Mark Bromley to “take Willford on” on the issue where she’s strongest.

The problem is that Mark Bromley is a stark raving lunatic. Bromley has studied women “since conception?” What the hell does that even mean? Bromley spent most of his time in college “living in the Woman’s Dorm?” Again, what the hell does that even mean, and why didn’t it result in a restraining order? We’ll confess to being a bit surprised that despite all of this, Bromley has managed to find a spouse who tolerates his offensive delusions. But that too does not an expert on women’s studies make.

To summarize, Mark Bromley did not “totally” graduate women’s studies. Bromley is that guy who says he did because the absurdity of it makes his fellow assholes laugh.

And as Bromley’s record amply demonstrates, winning elections is not the point.