The Real Walker Stapleton Stands Back Up

Walker Stapleton.

Republican gubernatorial nominee Walker Stapleton penned an opinion piece for Fox News this week about his great big battle against “socialism” in Colorado. The entire column consists of 558 words of Trumpian talking points, but it does illustrate something of moderate interest…

This is the real Walker Stapleton.

It is difficult to find someone in Colorado who truly believes that Stapleton might defeat Democrat Jared Polis next Tuesday, so perhaps Stapleton now feels comfortable enough to return to his truest shade of red.

This is the Walker Stapleton who used to appear on Fox News to complain about legislative efforts to limit obscene bonuses for corporate executives. This is the Walker Stapleton who said these words on national television:

“The most alarming thing to me [is that] President Obama is now trying to take away tax loopholes for corporations.”

Walker Stapleton, fighting to protect corporate tax loopholes!

Like most things Stapleton, our favorite part about his Fox News opinion piece is the end:

While we are working tirelessly to defeat socialism in Colorado, it ultimately will be up to voters. It is my hope and prayer that voters across the country choose to let freedom ring and that Coloradans’ voices are heard from coast to coast.

You can imagine this closing paragraph going through several iterations:

While we are occasionally working to defeat socialism…

If it is after 3:00 in the afternoon, we are working to defeat socialism…

If it is not raining or snowing, we are working to defeat socialism…

Unless we fell asleep, we are working to defeat socialism…


Honestly, we could do this all day. We’ll let our readers take it from here.

8 Community Comments, Facebook Comments

  1. Conserv. Head Banger says:

    "take away tax loopholes for corporations……." 

    Funny. I took some MBA courses back in the 1970s. One of my professors; a fairly consistent conservative; openly opined in class that the biggest drag on the economy then was subsidies for corporations. 

    • JohnInDenver says:

      Well, Stapleton's comments on Fox brought out a host of people insisting Colorado shouldn't become like California — or Washington state — or "big cities" inevitably ruined by Democrats.

      The attack "Polis can't pay for xxxx" is curious. Ultimate goals don't happen unless someone sets the goal.  Apparently, Stapleton can't conceive that xxxx" won't happen UNLESS there is a vote for taxes to make "xxxx" work.

      • RepealAndReplace says:

        Precisely. If Polis puts together a credible plan and presents it to the voters, they will either approve or reject it. But Polis cannot raise taxes; only the voters can. He can ask them but that's about it.


  2. davebarnes says:

    Don't mention your opponent's name 7 times. I am just saying.

  3. spaceman65 says:

    "Walker Stapleton will fight for your . . . oh wait, it's snowing, check back tomorrow."


  4. Pseudonymous says:

    While we once waited at a bus stop for two full cycles of the nearby traffic signal, believing with all our hearts that the coach would soon arrive to take us into the office to defeat socialism, we grew despondent at its failure to timely appear and went to a nearby Wendy's instead.  Perhaps tomorrow, God will grant us the wherewithal to defeat the socialist menace.

  5. mynameischarlie says:

    I sure hope he doesn't win. We don't need a Colorado "Trump" to match that awful thing in the White House.

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