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August 01, 2022 02:16 PM UTC

Deep Thoughts By Lauren Boebert: Canine Cuisine!

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  • by: Colorado Pols

As readers know, we have adopted a policy of screening the daily firehose of foolery from freshman GOP outrage singularity Rep. Lauren “Q*Bert” Boebert for only the most relevant or newsworthy items, lest we become a blog wholly dedicated to cataloguing the misdeeds of any one politician–which would certainly gratify Boebert’s ego, but quickly become boring to our esteemed readers.

But once in awhile, we’re obliged to rock back in our chair and just marvel at the insanity as it rises occasionally to a level where it cannot be ignored even at risk of undue publicity. And in an interview with fellow fringe luminary Sebastian Gorka, Boebert managed to deliver just such a performance:

 

Describing her rationale for confronting Beto O’Rourke back in 2019 when O’Rourke famously promised to “take your AR-15” as President, things took a turn for the canine gastronomical:

BOEBERT: And when Beto O’Rourke told the world the Democrat playbook, “Hell yes, we intend to take your AR-15 in your AK-47,” I was compelled to go to him because I saw that a disarmed populace–if the citizenry in America is disarmed, then we are no longer citizens. We are subjects.

You know here in America, we have gourmet treats for puppies. We have these amazing groomers for dogs. Well in Venezuela, they eat the dogs. [Pols emphasis] And it started because they don’t have firearms. They do not have a way to protect themselves, to defend themselves, against a tyrannical government.

There are of course a number of cultures in which eating what we in America consider “man’s best friend” is perfectly acceptable–whether necessitated by poverty, or dogs just plain being on the menu in some countries we won’t name since there’s no need to offend American sensibilities by reminding you that yes, in some places people eat dogs. We’ve never tried dog, unless it was slipped in without our knowledge at a chili cookoff. But biologically speaking, we’re sorry to say it, protein is protein.

How this relates to gun control is anybody’s guess, but Sebastian Gorka didn’t complain.

That’s why he’s so popular.

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