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November 23, 2011 02:32 AM UTC

Gessler Announces Search Committee for Deputy SOS Position

  • 14 Comments
  • by: Colorado Pols

Republican Secretary of State Scott Gessler is hiring! Today Gessler’s office announced that a search committee has been formed in order to fill the position of Deputy Secretary of State, which became vacant when Bill Hobbs announced his retirement this fall.

You can read the full press release after the jump. We also happened to find a copy of the official job announcement, which you can read below:

JOB DESCRIPTION

The Colorado Secretary of State’s office is seeking candidates to fill the position of Deputy Secretary of State.

RESPONSIBILITIES

According to a press release announcing the vacancy, “The Deputy Secretary of State serves as a key advisor to Secretary of State Scott Gessler, focusing on public policy in both elections and business filings.” For the purposes of this job opening, the term “key advisor” shall mean “to do whatever Scott Gessler tells you to do without questioning whether or not it makes any sense.”

EDUCATION

Bachelor’s Degree required, law degree preferred. In lieu of college degree, proof of Republican voter registration will suffice.

EXPERIENCE

Would be nice, but not all that important.

QUALIFICATIONS AND ABILITIES

  • Successful candidate will have solid understanding of Colorado election law in order to properly explain things to the Secretary of State.

  • Basic understanding of process for filing frivolous and unnecessary lawsuits.

  • Search committee member Gigi Dennis may expect the successful candidate to have absolutely no idea how to do the job.

  • Strong fundraising background a must. The successful candidate must be willing and able to help raise money for Republican County Parties and other organizations in order to help them pay for any fines that might not be entirely reversible by Gessler. Willingness to sit in a dunk tank preferred.

  • Excellent graphic design skills are a plus. Enlarging Scott Gessler’s head shot on the Secretary of State’s website is a top priority.

  • Weak organizational skills required. It is much easier to explain purging people from the voter roles if it is truly an accident.

  • Experienced investigator required. The Secretary of State’s office is having a heck of a time finding an example of an illegal immigrant voter. Successful candidate will be expected to at least find one illegal voter.

  • Must be willing to openly complain about Governor John Hickenlooper and Democrats at the state legislature.
  • PAY AND BENEFITS

    Almost certainly inadequate, but opportunities may exist to do outside legal work to make extra cash. Successful candidate will have the option to purchase an older-model Honda Civic.

    HOW TO APPLY

    Applicants for the position will be vetted by a search committee, which includes former U.S. Senator Hank Brown; former Secretary of State Gigi Dennis; DHR International Executive V.P. Debra Young; local attorney Jim Hackstaff and Hobbs. Calvin was not available. Interested applicants should send a cover letter and resume to dana.williams@sos.state.co.us if they aren’t concerned about getting a response. All others should wait for the search committee to call.

    Applicants will not be disqualified because of race, sex, creed or color, but you’d be a damn fool to disclose that you are gay. Candidates of all political parties are encouraged to apply, but resumes that are not from lifelong Republicans will be thrown in the trash.

    Please note that this job description is not real and may have been completely invented by Colorado Pols. For something that is real, click to read the press release after the jump.

    Gessler announces search team for Deputy Secretary


    Denver, Colorado – Today, Secretary of State Scott Gessler introduced the members of his search committee aimed at identifying candidates to be the next Deputy Secretary of State. The announcement comes after current Deputy Secretary of State Bill Hobbs announced his plans to retire.

    The committee members include former U.S. Senator Hank Brown, former Secretary of State Gigi Dennis, DHR International Executive V.P. Debra Young, local attorney Jim Hackstaff and Hobbs.

    “This new political appointee has big shoes to fill and I look to the guidance and experience of these leaders to help find the best fit for the office,” Gessler said. “We have incredible opportunities and challenges ahead and anyone wanting to be a leader in the organization should apply.”

    The Deputy Secretary of State serves as a key advisor to Gessler focusing on public policy in both elections and business filings. Anyone interested in applying should send his or her resume and cover letter to dana.williams@sos.state.co.us.

    Gessler hopes to fill the vacancy by early next year.

    Comments

    14 thoughts on “Gessler Announces Search Committee for Deputy SOS Position

    1. Must demonstrate flexibility — bowing and scraping in front of Mr. Gessler in particular

      Ability to execute flawless verbal pirouettes.  For example, at news conferences when explaining Mr. Gessler’s otherwise inexplicable actions.

      Inability to say “No, Mr. Gessler, we can’t do that because it would be wrong”.

    2. than you think.

      Didn’t Hickenlooper already appoint just about every Republican in this state competent enough to tie his or her own shoes to one of his vacancies?

      1. Are you really expecting Gessler to appoint someone competent? If they were compentent, they would run far, far from this vacancy. Notably the very competent Hobbs is.

        1. I can’t imagine what possessed me to think for a single minute that competency would become a factor for this search.

          Gessler should have no problem whatsoever finding a slathering toady incompetent enough to serve as his sycophantic deputy — his biggest challenge will be narrowing the field.

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