CO-04 (Special Election)
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(R) Greg Lopez
(R) Trisha Calvarese
90%
10%
President (To Win Colorado)
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(D) Joe Biden*
(R) Donald Trump
80%
20%↓
CO-01 (Denver)
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(D) Diana DeGette*
90%
CO-02 (Boulder-ish)
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(D) Joe Neguse*
90%
CO-03 (West & Southern CO)
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(D) Adam Frisch
(R) Jeff Hurd
(R) Ron Hanks
40%
30%
20%
CO-04 (Northeast-ish Colorado)
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(R) Lauren Boebert
(R) Deborah Flora
(R) J. Sonnenberg
30%↑
15%↑
10%↓
CO-05 (Colorado Springs)
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(R) Dave Williams
(R) Jeff Crank
50%↓
50%↑
CO-06 (Aurora)
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(D) Jason Crow*
90%
CO-07 (Jefferson County)
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(D) Brittany Pettersen
85%↑
CO-08 (Northern Colo.)
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(D) Yadira Caraveo
(R) Gabe Evans
(R) Janak Joshi
60%↑
35%↓
30%↑
State Senate Majority
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DEMOCRATS
REPUBLICANS
80%
20%
State House Majority
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DEMOCRATS
REPUBLICANS
95%
5%
April 23, 2020 04:29 PM UTC
27 Comments
If you are a potential Dumpster® voter, please inject yourself with Clorox® Cleanup and MAGA.
“It’s a game-changer!”
“Whadaya’ got to lose?”
Yesterday the Insane Clown Posse (a real band) announced the cancellation of The Gathering of the Jugalos (a real thing) at the *same* time *rump was pushing to reopen the country.
Let that marinate.
The sad thing here is that Trump's echo chambers (the evening entertainers on Fox; Limbaugh; Breitbart; etc.) will pick up on this, publicize it, and people with obvious mental disorders who can't think for themselves, will try it.
Moddy’s really gonna’ shove a lightbulb up his ass? . . .
I was really so hoping this was the Onion or some other satire site, but no. And yes, some low info or desperate folks will try injecting themselves with bleach or lighting up their bodies “from the inside”.
And Dr Birx is sitting there, while Trump keeps asking her, “You’re going to investigate that, right?We’re going to check it out?”
The thought balloon over her head says No you cretin, we’re not going to investigate injecting coronavorus patients with disinfectant. We’re not going to shine really powerful lights on people to kill the virus. Everyone within the sound of your voice is now much more stupid . Please, please don’t try this at home…..
But she says nothing, because she is a coward who likes her job.
Dr Birx and all the other sycophants just cannot bring themselves to say, "You have no clothes on, you ugly emperor!"
It remains stunning to me that so many people are content to watch Trump bring our country down to its knees. Putin got such a deal with the Toddler President!
However Brix got where she is – she's going to keep on keeping on
Mattis wouldda kicked her ass. Wait- pretty sure he did.
Can you imagine how frustrated the writers at The Onion must be trying to outdo this airhead in off the wall sketches.
I have had that same thought. I'm just not that creative.
In other words: You just can't make this stuff up.
From the Irish Times….
Yup, worth reposting:
Ultraviolet light inside the body in "some other way". Sounds like an ultraviolet enema. Little King Donnie first.
Or, maybe just inject me with shit. You’re going to test that, right Dr. Birx?
Let’s be careful. He must be distracting us from something that’s really, really bad.
There's an alt-med huckster out there named Jim Humble. Dude's a former Scientologist who now has his own religion and claims to be a billion-year-old god from the Andromeda galaxy.
Ol' Jim sells a miraculous bleach product that cures just about anything. You can ingest it, inject it, use is topically or even ram it up the ass of your autistic child to correct behavior flare-ups. People being idiots, Humble is a very wealthy man.
What's the over/under on how long it will take for financial ties between Jim Humble and the Trumps to surface?
@Genghis: remember that the purpose of most religions is to separate people from their hard-earned money.
To all the Trumpers on here, us "libs" would really hate it if you tried this. Trying this is the perfect way to "own the libs".
Finally he says something that I can get on board with. I support this.
Many people; well, some people; actually, only a few people believe that Fantastic Voyage was a documentary.
One person has invoked the Defense Production Act to compel GM to make a million copies of the Proteus so they can be placed into citizens' bodies and zap the coronavirus with UV light.
When asked about it, President Trump said: "Raquel Welch, nice tits".
And this shit gets aired on national TV every night. The good news is it is having the opposite effect of reassuring Americans that their president is working with a full deck. The guy just gets in front of the cameras and wings it spewing whatever random thought floats by. In retrospect, Republicans are going to see these briefings by the president as a really bad idea. Democrats don't have to spend a dime on negative ads portraying him as a clueless and dangerous nut.
So now, the upshot of all of this is that various manufacturers, including the makers of Lysol, have been frantically issuing press releases advising people not to inject, or otherwise ingest, their products in an attempt to defeat a Covid infection . . .
. . . they realize the risk they will have after several Bubbas and Bubbettes have died or injured themselves from this — that there are dozens of Strong Arms just salivating at the opportunity to sue the bejeezus outta’ their companies. No one if going to sue Ttump, however.
So, do not be surprised when you see some manufacturer of shop lights or flashlights adding a warning to their packaging, “WARNING: Not safe, or intended, for insertion into your mouth, nose, ears, or any assundry naughty bits.”
Also, don’t be surprised when you start seeing late night commercials, beginning with: “Did you or a loved one die or injure yourselves from sitting on a Tac-Light? . . .”
You are Too funny,
Is it the dope or the booze?
D.
All of the above, and then some . . .
I just wonder if Wal-mart is pulling all those little $1 LED flashlights from their shelves?
And, if you think last night’s clown show was spectacular, just stay tuned for tonight’s broadcast!!!!! . . .
What with all the maelstrom this yuge stupidity has kicked up, you just know Ttumpty’s got no choice now but to start his doubling-down . . .
"Safer at Home Colorado" tweeted a response to Trump's encouragement of UV light …..
NSFW …. https://twitter.com/RockyMountViews/status/1253467152629129217