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July 17, 2010 10:07 AM UTC

Jeopardy insults

  • by: Diogenesdemar

(It’s a slow day, so I’m retitling this diary and promoting it to let foes of given candidates play this version of Jeopardy Insults.    The author didn’t quite get the nature of Jeopardy right — you don’t spell the answer, you’re given the answer and must supply the question.  Example: “An old curmudgeon rashly elected to Front Page Editor:”

BJWilson: “Who is Voyageur?”  So, have at it (within the usual bounds of our impeccable good taste, of course.)   – promoted by Voyageur

Jeopardy Question:  “How do you spell vacuous?”

Check out yesterday’s Colorado Matters broadcast interview with senate (and sometimes suggested replacement-gubernatorial-as-consolation-prize-loser) candidate, Jane Norton.…

I’ve often heard what a dim bulb Jane is, but I have to confess I never actually have heard her speak (outside of her badly scripted and delivered campaign commercials) until yesterday morning.

Between poorly parroting GOP talking points, simply outlandish jabber, and much outright avoidance answering the questions posed, this is some of the most entertaining self-parody and nonsense that I have heard this year (and that’s saying something).  Just one problem, J-No was slinging it straight.

Interviewer Ryan Warner is, on several occasions, nearly unable to hide his incredulity.  (Still, he’s appropriately servile, er – “polite,” enough not to ask any of the obvious death-blow follow-up questions.)

While simultaneously negotiating I-25 traffic and laughing my ass off I sadly missed some of what was said.  But, my favorite candidate response was to a question about the problem of illegal immigration.  Jane’s partial solution to this complex problem — because there is insufficient jail space to hold 12 million illegal immigrants – those who won’t voluntarily leave should be given 30-day community service sentences.  Problem solved!

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you candidate V-A-C-U-O-U-S.


32 thoughts on “Jeopardy insults

  1. and you give answers.  In this case, the board would say

    Jane Norton.

    The winning contestant would say “What is vacuous?”


    The board: A vacuous candidate.

      Contestant: “Who is Jane Norton?”  

    1. The Answer is:

      Pour from a bottle off the lobbyist shelf, splash in a jigger of RINO juice and stir with a nice pair of stems. Add a dash of bitters.

      Alex, what is a Jane Norton?

    1. It’s the candidates that snub their nose at people that are losing. They only care about you if you donate a lot of money to their campaigns.

      1. It’s physically impossible for a candidate to personally connect with more than a small minority of the voters (unless you can warp the space-time continuum). So the media is the only way they can reach most voters.

  2. Jeopardy Question:  Who the hell do you think you are rewriting my diary entry?

    You guys sure take your game shows seriously.

    Just kidding, I couldn’t resist the comic possibilities.  Thanks for the edit Voyaguer, I’m fairly new to this and do appreciate your assistance.

    Signing off now — plan to spend the next few hours swimming laps in a bucket of Mojitos.  Have a good weekend everybody.

  3. This nearly universally reviled Colorado Pols participant inspired the word “Blowger,” which means “a blogger who combines ignorance, irrationiality, smugness, and a combination of obnoxious false bravado, ridiculous attempts at self-legitimation, and pathetic whining, all into the most repugnant package possible.”

    Da-da-da-da, da-da-da. DA–da-da-da, da-da-da. Da-da-da-da, da-da-da. DA–da-da-da, da-da-da.

    Let’s see how our contestants did….

          1. That is indeed the question to the answer: “The phrase that BJ Wilson has used now a couple of dozen times to demonstrate his frustration at having absolutely nothing more interesting to say.” Unfortunately, the game was already over, and we’ve called security to have you removed. But we don’t want to send you away empty handed: here’s a copy of “how to wank in private, please.” We really hope you read it.

            1. That’s what I really want to know. “we’ve called security to have you removed” – you’re one to complain about annoying posts /snark

              1. or how you choose to misinterpret statements, or what you arbitrarily believe. And a lot of people have said as much, a lot of times, in just one more illustration of your remarkable inability to process information. When your only skill is to annoy the hell out of others, while demonstrating a complete lack of knowledge or rationality, it’s really nothing to strut and crow about. (Yeah, yeah, “so stop strutting and crowing about it, Steve.” We get it already.)

                1. I know it’s been a long, hot, topsy-turvy week when at the end of it I’m stifling my natural tendencies and even attempting to write thoughtful and intelligent posts (below), and you’re the one flogging the knuckleheads.

                  (“knuckleheads” . . . there, that feels much better.)

                  1. This particular knucklehead has spent considerable time and effort trying to convince me that I’m not up to the task of flogging him, so I just felt that it would be ungentlemanly of me to leave his “flog-wish” unfulfilled.

                    1. and you’ll never hear any recriminations from me.

                      Hell, I’m glad to see you’re now saving the prime rib for those with the ability to appreciate it.

  4. If the parties were all switched here, and a blogger called, say, Terrance Carroll, “vacuous” the more liberal and thoughtful people on this blog would rightly call the writer out for driving the debate down instead of elevating it.

    I don’t know a lot about Jane, but the people I know who like her like her a lot and are fiercely loyal to her. That counts for a lot. She may not have a speaking style that you like, but she is clear about what she believes.

    And you may not like her solution about illegal immigration, but at least she is proposing something new and is willing to talk about it publicly. To a lot of Colorado voters, I think her solution will make sense. Various sides have proposed a lot of other solutions that haven’t worked… here’s a new one. Maybe it’s worth trying.

    1. that had I had heard the same or similar interview answers from Terrance Carrol that were given by Jane Norton, I still would have also used the terms “vacuous,” “dim bulb,” etc., etc.,

      (I’ll also be the first to admit, however, that to issues of self I’m probably just as myopic and deluded as most persons.)

      Having said that, I do agree with you many of the liberals on this site attack perceived slights like a pod of orcas.  (That doesn’t mean that there aren’t packs of white shark tea-cons, while admittedly fewer in number, swimming these same oceans.)

      A lot of the kids way, way, way back in high school liked and were fiercely loyal to the drill team and members of the cheerleading squad.  They were great at what they did, but you really see a beneift to having many of them teaching your class of calculus, biology, or physics, would you?

      And, melting down baby seals as a solution to the energy problem would be a new (I think) and interesting (in a stretched sense of the word) idea, but are you going to give that proprosal props?  Is it something you want to see become actual policy?

      So, while I agree with much of what you write (except for the, “but she is clear about what she believes” — and I’ll even give you that as a (very remote) possibility, although I sure can’t tell it from the CPR interview I listened to), I gotta ask scodtt:  What’s your point?

      1. I think it’s intellectually sloppy for you to confuse your disagreement with the candidate on what she believes for her abilities as a radio talk show guest.


        From Jonah Lehrer, author of “How We Decide.”

        You get credit for at least listening to someone with whom you disagree, but your laughter and your derision were ways for you to justify why it is that she is irrational and you are not.

        You are not alone in this at all. As you’ll see on that post, it’s the pundits who are more delusional than any other group. I say this not to call names, but just to illustrate the core of my beef with your post.

        1. Interesting, and hard to quibble with.

          We make our decisions based upon factors, many (most?) of which are irrational.

          I’m certainly one of the many we(s) on this planet.

          I don’t, however, think I’m confusing what was said with the way it was delivered — I actually disagree with both the message and the messenger (but, obviously from my post, not in the most agreeable manner possible.)

          And, rationally or irrationally, you can probably bet that my future opinions (should I ever have the misfortune to hear another Jane Norton interview), will be markedly informed by my first experience.

          But, here’s a little challenge for you;  why not read the transcripts from all four of the CPR senate candidates interviews, and then let me know who you think is the best and who is the least functionally informed of the four?

          (PS.  In case you’re wondering, I’m unaffilated — with probably a few more liberal leanings than conservative ones.  But, I don’t have a favored horse in any of the primaries.  In fact in the interest of my and my family’s future, I’d really like to see both parties bring out their best, brightest, and most qualified candidates — I really believe that our future depends on it.  And, I’m deeply troubled by what I see as the “fact” that we’re not getting anywhere close to it, particularly in the case of the candidate at issue here.)

  5. Listening to the podcast of her interview she said she would collect the fed gas tax and keep it.  Not send it to D.C. but just keep it here for our own use.  Because we only get 91c/1.00 back from the feds in hwy funds.

    How exactly would that work?  Wouldn’t the fed have a little problem with that?

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