April 25, 2013 04:21 PM UTC

At Least This Isn't Your Trainwreck of a Campaign

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• by: Colorado Pols

THURSDAY UPDATE: Who the hell is running Sanford's campaign? As the Huffington Post reports, yesterday Sanford held a sidewalk debate with a cardboard cutout of Nancy Pelosi. Yes, we just wrote that sentence.

Congressional candidate and former South Carolina Gov. Mark Sanford (R) held a mock debate with a cardboard cutout of House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi (D-Calif.) Wednesday morning, on a sidewalk outside Medical University of South Carolina. Sanford said the Pelosi cutout was a stand-in for his opponent, Elizabeth Colbert Busch, because she is avoiding public appearances.

What. The. F***?

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Former South Carolina Governor and current Republican Congressional candidate Mark Sanford is bungling his political comeback attempt to such an outrageous degree that it's hard to understand how he ever got elected to anything before. Like, ever.

Last week the NRCC pulled their support for Sanford after it was revealed that his ex-wife recently accused him of trespassing. So what does Sanford do? We'll let our friends at "The Fix" (try to) explain:

Fix rule of politics: ItВ’s never a good thing for your campaign when you take out a full-page ad in a local paper explaining why you trespassed on your ex-wifeВ’s property. Like, ever.

But, thatВ’s exactly what former South Carolina governor Mark Sanford did over the weekend in the Charleston Post and Courier…

…What better way to solve that problem than a 1,200-plus word paid ad that not only rehashes В— in painstaking detail В— SanfordВ’s decision to go to his wifeВ’s home when she was out of town to watch the Superbowl with one of his sons but also includes phrases like В“I have faults and they are well chronicledВ”?

Here's the full ad in all of its idiotic glory.