Rep. Mike Coffman Endorses Andrew Romanoff in CD-6

coffmanromanoff

The scene from today’s surprise announcement.

Rep. Mike Coffman Endorses Andrew Romanoff in CD-6

Monday, April 1, 2013

AURORA: In a stunning turn of events, incumbent GOP Rep. Mike Coffman announced this morning that he is endorsing his Democratic opponent, former Colorado Speaker of the House Andrew Romanoff, for election to Coffman’s CD-6 seat in 2014.

“Since narrowly surviving my re-election bid in 2012, I’ve come to realize that former House Speaker Andrew Romanoff already holds most of the positions on the major issues best suited to a representative of the Sixth Congressional District,” said Coffman. “As part of my shameless attempt to re-invent myself in accordance with my newly competitive and diverse constituency, I am endorsing Romanoff’s campaign to represent my district in Congress.”

Coffman clarified that is he not exiting the race for CD-6, and intends to win re-election to his congressional seat in 2014.

“Look, I’ve got to be careful here,” said a frank Rep. Coffman. “Last year, I almost lost this seat to a totally unknown pipsqueak. It was so much easier when I only had to answer to Tom Tancredo and the Castle Rock Trap and Skeet Club! I need time to make this reinvention thing stick, and the best way to buy that time is to sound like I agree with Democrats on everything. Of course I’m not really agreeing, so I have to be careful not to actually say anything concrete myself.”

“With that in mind, endorsing Romanoff until I can figure out how to thread this needle is the safest thing to do,” said Coffman. “Whenever you get a statement from Romanoff’s campaign, please add ‘Rep. Coffman agrees action needs to be taken.’ If said statement is calling for action not to be taken, please change my response accordingly.”

“Working together, we’re finally going to give this district the leadership it needs,” said Coffman.

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APRIL FOOL!

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  1. hawkeye says:

    If Mike Coffman endorses an "open border" immigration policy, and an expanded EIC, then he's a sure winner in CD-6 …

  2. BlueCatBlueCat says:

    Gee.  I guess I was silly to worry about Romanof needing any PAC money.

  3. dwyer says:

    I talked to Mike and said, "Look, Andrew is the wave of the future. Catch it while you can."  Mike, knowing I am a political sage, agreed to talk my advice.

    Another one for my book.

     

  4. exlurker19 says:

    Very funny, you guys.

  5. Sir RobinSir Robin says:

    And in other news….

    Men With Copious Back Hair Among First Predicted to Perish as Climate Warms; Center Petitions to Protect Them

     

     

     

  6. ArapaGOPArapaGOP says:

    April Fool's Day was made for Alinsky lovers like Colorado Pols. Hats off to you.

  7. ClubTwitty says:

    'Alinsky lovers'?  OM-effing-G

  8. Curmudgeon says:

    "Alinsky lovers" 

    That's the level of cleverness you can expect from someone who can't even recognize an April Fool's joke. 

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