March 10, 2011 10:07 PM UTC

SB 133: Give Kids A Fair Shake

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• by: nancycronk

I give my kid a lot of credit for allowing me to share his story, in hopes that other kids will not have to go through what he did. Here is our family’s testimony regarding Senate Bill 133, in the form of a letter to Senators Newell and Hudak. SB133 would allow the Colorado Commission on Criminal and Juvenile Justice (CCJJ) to study the issue of fair discipline in schools. My son’s situation (thankfully) did not involve law enforcement, but it does give some insight into the downward spiraling effect of Zero Tolerance policies in schools.

March 10, 2011

Senators Newell and Hudak,

I am in favor of Senate Bill 133, giving the state the ability to review fair discipline in public schools. I would like to share our family’s story with you. (I changed my son’s name to protect him on the internet.)

It was the 1999-2000 academic year, and our son Aaron was in the fifth grade. Aaron was an “A” student, attended religious school weekly, played an instrument, was in Gifted and Talented classes, took after-school science classes, was in the baseball card club, and participated heavily in boy scouts and sports. He loved school, and adored his teachers. As his Mom, I volunteered two to three times each week at the school. Our son was excited about school, turned on by academics, and told everyone he wanted to be a chemist. At the end of 5th grade, he was chosen by the fifth grade staff at his school to receive the “President’s Award for Academic Excellence”. He had worked hard to earn it, and we were all very proud. He was supposed to receive the award at an assembly for that purpose.

The Columbine High School tragedy had just happened a few weeks prior, and educators everywhere, as well as parents, were edgy and nervous. The media of the day was inundated with dime-store analysis of what happened. Was it the music the kids listened to, their hairstyles, or the comic books they read that caused them to become violent? Churches were blaming working mothers, dark trench-coats and rap music. Liberals were blaming lax gun control laws, video games and violent movies. Everyone was asking why the school system did not identify the shooters earlier to get them help. Parents demanded that school systems do something… anything… to prevent the tragedy from happening again. School boards looked for a swift response to the problem to avoid the sudden onslaught of scrutiny and condemnation.

The concept of “Zero Tolerance” was embraced. Essentially, “Zero Tolerance” dictates a super-strict response to perceived transgressions – a school system can suspend or expel students for any reason, at any time. No investigation is warranted. Under “Zero Tolerance” schools are quick to refer many transgressions to the police and the juvenile court system.

The news of the day was soon filled with stories of preschoolers punished for using sharp items to cut their play-dough, kindergartners being suspended for bringing plastic knives to cut the sandwiches in their lunchboxes, kids on playgrounds expelled for saying, “Bang, your dead”, and second graders referred to psychiatrists for making pictures only using dark color crayons. It was a tense time everywhere, and my son’s little elementary school was no exception.

The day before the Awards assembly, my son and I were called into the Principal’s office. Up until that day, we had a close and respectful relationship with him. The school yearbook had just come out, and there was a group photo where my son was smiling and clowning around. One of my son’s hands was partially in-sight, and partially out of sight, with only three fingers visible. A parent who saw the photo told the Principal he was “flashing a gang symbol”. Because it was post-Columbine, he caved to her ranting, and suspended my son, calling it “unintended consequences”. The suspension was going to happen on the day of the assembly, so he would not be getting the award in front of the whole school after all. The district’s Zero Tolerance policy did not require an investigation, only an accusation, we were told.

My son was devastated. The best week of his young life, suddenly became one of the worst. To make matters worse, when Aaron was at the bus stop, one of our neighbor kids announced to all who were waiting there, “My Mom says you are in a gang”. My son didn’t even know what a gang was.  When he got home after school, I had to explain it to him. Socializing at his age was difficult enough — getting labeled unfairly left him with little self esteem to face his classmates again.

Until that day, our local elementary school had been like family to us, especially since we lived one thousand miles away from relatives. That “family” had suddenly become a place of persecution. I stayed up that night, trying to find an all-night copy store that could blow up the photo so everyone could see there was no gang symbol. In the morning, I showed the Principal the blown up photo, a letter from my son, and a chart I pulled off the internet of “known gang symbols in the western half of the United States”. After looking at the photo enlargement, the Principal agreed my son’s fingers were not making any known gang symbol, and admitted that the post-Columbine tension had caused him to over-react.

He also said that the school policy prohibited him from apologizing to my son, admitting he was wrong publicly, or reversing the suspension. He said it would not be on Aaron’s transcript, offered to give my son the award he deserved privately, and asked me to forget all about it.  Of course, I refused. My son already been humiliated. The recognition he worked for for six years was dangled in front of his face, and then stripped from him based on a lie. Knowing that the Principal knew his decision was wrong and refused to acknowledge it or make reparations, rubbed salt into our wound.  

I immediately went to the Superintendant of the  School District, who was completely unsympathetic. Without even hearing our side of the story fully, he stood with the Principal. On the drive home, all I could think of was, “He must have some kind of suspension quota to fill.” It did not make sense. At home, I told my son I tried the very best I could to defend his honor. He said, “I hate the Principal, and I hate school.”  He took the certificate for the Presidential Award, and I have never seen it since (he may have thrown it away, or flushed it down the toilet– I don’t know). To him, it is a reminder of the day he first learned to hate school.

That day was a turning point for Aaron — something died in him that day. His thirst for knowledge and love of education for education’s sake was extinguished for a long, long time. Despite moving to a new neighborhood, talking to every guidance counselor ever assigned to him, explaining life isn’t fair sometimes and he shouldn’t blame all schools for what happened, middle school and high school were not what they  could have been for him. His heart was no longer in school. It was no longer the one place he felt he had some personal power in life; it now seemed confusing and unfair.

Fortunately, his years of pain have a happy ending. At age 22, and after several years of therapy, my son is getting straight A’s in community college, and intends to transfer soon to a highly selective University, where he intends to study engineering. He is a good citizen, obeys the law, and chooses friends carefully. The chip on his shoulder has finally receded. He realizes now that his future is in his hands, and his alone.

Still, I wonder how much money we could have saved as parents on therapy, and how many years of emotional pain all of us could have been saved – had his Principal had the courage to say, “This policy is wrong. This kid is a good kid. If he did something wrong, it was because he didn’t understand what he was doing.”

It’s true, the Zero Tolerance policies in school districts across America may have saved lives somewhere, but they have also devastated many more. My heart aches for all of the kids who have been scapegoated, labeled, and humiliated. Kids who should have been issued a warning and educated, rather than suspended, expelled, or referred to law enforcement — when they made a mistake.

Discipline and consequences are a good thing, when they are coupled with education. The Zero Tolerance policies do not educate children. They result in kids feeling victimized rather than remorseful, and they often result in a downward spiral of low self esteem and acting out. School districts are in the business of educating children. A sound discipline policy needs to be fair, and provide kids an opportunity – the opportunity to learn from their mistakes, to take responsibility for their behavior, and to be given the chance to do well again. If a student who is given these opportunities still chooses inappropriate behavior, then the school is absolutely justified in suspending or expelling the student. If the student chooses illegal behavior, it is then justified that the the legal system should become involved, as well. Supporters of Senate Bill 133 are not asking for leniency; we are asking for fairness for Colorado’s kids.

Senators Newell and Hudak – thank you for believing in the young people of our country, and for being willing to give them a fair shake. My family, and the families of so many other young people, honor you for your courage and sense of justice.

Nancy Cronk, Arapahoe County