Stephen Colbert Inevitably Discovers "Dr. Chaps"

14 Comments

by: Colorado Pols

When we say that the election of Gordon "Dr. Chaps" Klingenschmitt to the Colorado General Assembly a week ago is a "victory" that Colorado Republicans will come to sorely regret, last night's episode of The Colbert Report is what we mean.

“Yes,” Colbert replied, “it is reminiscent of the positive campaign the villagers ran to elect Frankenstein. But Klingenschmitt stands for so much more. He doesn’t hate the gays, he’s just concerned for them, as he demonstrates on his YouTube program.”

“The demonic spirits inside the homosexual agenda are trying to redefine family,” Klingenschmitt says in the clip, “trying to homosexualize your children. Jesus, if he were giving marriage counseling to two gay men who were married, Jesus would command them to get divorced.”

“Yes,” Colbert responded, “if Jesus were their marriage counselor, he would tell them to get divorced. And he would take 65 minutes to do it, so he could charge them the second hour. But it’s not just the gays — everyone needs a little Klingenschmitt exorcism.”

"If you're not voting for him, you're voting for the Democrat and quite honestly legislative majorities matter," said Klingenschmitt's predecessor in House District 15, former House Minority Leader Mark Waller, explaining how he or anyone could vote for a candidate who honestly believes that the President of the United States–among many, many others–is literally possessed by demons. Or that a sitting member of Congress wants to "join ISIS" in beheading Americans. Or that Obamacare "causes cancer," and the FCC is allowing "demonic spirits" to "visually rape your children." As our readers know, we could go on and on and on. The only thing that's changed now is that Klingenschmitt has actually won elected office–and as a state representative, Klingenschmitt metastasizes from irrelevant sideshow freak to a nationwide poster child for the far Republican right.

And before the story of "Dr. Chaps" is over, we predict Mark Waller will eat his words.

14 thoughts on “Stephen Colbert Inevitably Discovers “Dr. Chaps””

bullshit! says:

November 13, 2014 at 10:57 am

Chaps is who they are. Waller voted for Chaps because Chaps will vote the same way as Waller.

This is Doug Bruce's old seat. This is who they are.

Log in to Reply
1. The realist says:
  
  November 13, 2014 at 11:02 am
  
  Agree. It's not just the low information voter, it's the warped information voter (or plain old warped voter).
  
  Log in to Reply
2. Gilpin Guy says:
  
  November 13, 2014 at 11:46 am
  
  Exactly. This is who they are.
  
  As long as Klingenschmitt doesn't believe that Climate Change is real then he will be one of their golden dome boys. It's who they are.
  
  Log in to Reply
Moderatus says:

November 13, 2014 at 3:41 pm

Nice try. Klingenschmitt speaks for himself, NOT the GOP. Pols knew this before they wrote this BS, because the Colorado GOP denounced Klingenschmitt IN AUGUST.

http://kdvr.com/2014/08/25/gop-chair-klingenschmitt-comments-on-polis-isis-dont-reflect-republicans-as-a-whole/

Call told FOX31 Denver Monday night that the comments aren’t representative of Republicans as a whole.

“Gordon, as I’ve said before, does not speak for the Colorado Republican Party,” Call told FOX31 Denver. “His views do not reflect my personal position or the position of the party.

“But this tired, ineffectual tactic of trying to brand all Republicans based on these comments — the Todd Akin approach — it’s not going to work this time around,” Call continued. “Voters are too sophisticated. They know that one legislative candidate in Colorado Springs doesn’t reflect the views of Bob Beauprez or Cory Gardner.”

Log in to Reply
1. dustpuppy says:
  
  November 13, 2014 at 3:47 pm
  
  And still they voted for insanity over sanity. You own it, Moderatus, as a member of GORP.
  
  Log in to Reply
2. bullshit! says:
  
  November 13, 2014 at 4:46 pm
  
  Right, except at the local level they winked and nodded and told their people to vote for him. Including Mark Waller.
  
  Nice try…
  
  Log in to Reply
  1. FrankUnderwood says:
    
    November 13, 2014 at 6:13 pm
    
    Waller cements his reputation as a solid but sane conservative wedged in between two nut jobs.
    
    Log in to Reply
    1. gaf says:
      
      November 13, 2014 at 9:29 pm
      
      Waller a "solid but sane conservative"? Well, yeah. But definitely riding for the brand along with the crazies.
      
      Log in to Reply
3. Gilpin Guy says:
  
  November 13, 2014 at 4:55 pm
  
  But he does represent the views of every tiny brained doofus in the Republican Party who believes that climate change is a fantasy and a figment of the imagination. Democrats believe the demons of famine and ecological destruction are real and greedy Republicans work overtime like the businessman in Aliens to unleash them as often as possible. I'm much more afraid of the demons feared by Democrats than the demons feared by Klingenschmitt.
  
  Log in to Reply
gaf says:

November 13, 2014 at 5:25 pm

Claiming the Republicans "denounced" Klingenschmitt doesn't fly. Sure, Call make the statement that Dr. Chaps doesn't speak for the party. That's not a denouncement. And El Paso County Republican Chair Jeff Hays said, "He's a vote for a whole host of positive initiatives the Republican Party is going to have so absolutely we want him to win." That's not denouncement either. Then, the next time Dr. Chaps got national attention for his absurd statements, neither Hays nor El Paso County Republicans Executive Director Daniel Cole would make a public comment at all.

But I don't think Rep. Waller is concerned about "eating his words." Clearly that vote to try to reach a majority was important to Waller and the Republicans. They were willing to put up with the problems. Unfortunately, the rest of us have to live with the consequences as well.

Log in to Reply
1. mamajama55 says:
  
  November 13, 2014 at 7:59 pm
  
  You're right, gaf, and the Colorado Springs media (the Gazette and the Independent) also neglected to really publicize what a nutball the GOP candidate, Klingenschmitt, really was.
  
  I know – I sent them lots of material and tips on Klingenschmitt, which they never published. It's a shame.
  
  Log in to Reply
  1. ElliotFladen says:
    
    November 14, 2014 at 3:47 am
    
    Wasn't I the first person who told you about the interesting aspect of that race MJ?
    
    Log in to Reply
    1. mamajama55 says:
      
      November 14, 2014 at 6:36 am
      
      Certain interesting aspects of it, yes.
      
      Log in to Reply
mamajama55 says:

November 14, 2014 at 6:51 am

Chaps claims to have a mandate (from heaven, of course), against the "tyranny of gay marriage". Because gays are such tyrants.

Log in to Reply