Um, What? Legislature to Consider Legalizing Switchblades

Musical theater enthusiasts know full well the dangers of switchblades.

After last week’s pomp and speechifying, members of the Colorado legislature will finally start getting to work on tackling issues of vital importance to the citizens of our great state.

Also…legalizing switchblades.

Over the weekend we were forwarded a constituent newsletter sent out by state Sen. Owen Hill (R-Colorado Springs), in which the two-term Republican explains his legislative priorities for the 2017 session. “There are three bills I am working on right now with the help from our community,” writes Hill before launching into details about legislation surrounding school funding, legalizing self-driving cars, and his approach for dealing with the “construction defects reform” issue.

State Sen. Owen Hill contemplates a world where switchblades are legal.

Curiously, Sen. Hill fails to make any mention of a fourth bill that he is sponsoring: SB17-008, which seeks to legalize switchblades and “gravity knives” in Colorado. Here’s the title of that legislation, which is co-sponsored by state Rep. Steve Lebsock (D-Northglenn):

The bill legalizes the possession of a gravity knife or switchblade knife by removing such knives from the definition of “illegal weapon”.

Okay, but…why?

According to the draft legislation, the term “illegal weapon” refers to a “blackjack,” “gas gun,” OR “metallic knuckles.” Hill and Lebsock want to change state statute so that switchblades and “gravity knives” aren’t included in that same definition. Wisconsin Gov. Scott Walker signed legislation last February to legalize switchblades in Cheeseland, following similar efforts in states such as Oklahoma and Nevada that aim to fight back against the perception of “the misunderstood switchblade.” No, seriously, this is an actual argument made by adults.

But what of the switchblade comb?

Last fall, Colorado Republicans spent millions of dollars holding onto their one-seat majority in the State Senate. Presumably, this effort was not undertaken so that people like Hill could engage in discussions about the usefulness of spring-powered knives; on the other hand, Senate Republicans are introducing this as one of their first 10 pieces of legislation of the 2017 session.

Did the GOP just run out of new ideas for a commemorative license plate?

Look, if you are too embarrassed to mention your “legalizing switchblades” bill in your constituent outreach materials, then you probably should be spending your time working on something else.

6 Community Comments, Facebook Comments

  1. bullshit!bullshit! says:

    If you outlaw switchblades, only the Jets and the Sharks will have switchblades.

  2. VoyageurVoyageur says:

    I wish they would legalize switchblades and urge every punk to carry them.   I have a couple I use for letter openers/   As knives, they suck, making an impressive "snick" sound then wobbling.   Not at all a good choice for combat.

  3. Gray in Mountains says:

    Hill seems to be in a hurry to be a has-been

  4. mamajama55mamajama55 says:

    Owen Hill must be carrying water for some gun show or trade show lobbyist. Or perhaps the general wacked-out paranoids "Obamas comin fer yer guns so ya best carry a shank or two!" That covers a lot of groups these days… and Obama, that slacker, only has a few days left to make every gun nut’s nightmares come true.

    It's a real good way to get lots of kids expelled from school, cause I can guarantee that schools are not going to change their policies on what is a dangerous weapon just  because Mr. Hill wants to make some money for his sugar daddies.

  5. taterheaptom says:

    Marshall's Law is coming any day now! I read it on Andrei's go-to source for newsiness! 

  6. marklane1351 says:

    If the anti-switchblade crowd should not form their opinions from Hollywood, the anti-pot crowd should not be forming their opinion from "Reefer Madness"

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